Splinter of the Mind’s Eye – Part 38
New to Blue Milk Special? Start reading from the beginning!
Yes… Vader seriously says this to Luke in the book (and in the comic adaptation, remaining somewhat faithful despite how retarded a conclusion it is). Here’s the excerpt.
Moving leisurely down the pile of rubble, Darth Vader addressed them in a coldly conversational tone.
“You know, Skywalker, I had a difficult time finding out that it was you who shot up my TIE Fighter above the Death Star station. Rebellion spies are hard and expensive to come by. I also found out it was you who released the torpedo that destroyed the station. You have a great deal to atone for to me. I’ve waited a long time.”
—Splinter of the Mind’s Eye – Chapter 12 – by Alan Dean Foster
I shouldn’t have to point out that it was Han Solo who appeared out of no where at the last minute and shot Vader’s wing man, who then spun out and crashed into his buddy before bumping Vader’s TIE Fighter into space. So, it seems Vader has been wasting some money on rebel informants. Or perhaps Luke’s own legend is overshadowing Han Solo. I hope by drawing attention to Vader’s latest retarded moment we are highlighting some of the humorous errors. Sure, our version of the scene adds a semi-nude Leia searching for a nearly burnt out cigarette butt on the temple floor, but we do deviate a little now and then. ;=
The results are in. 562 BMS readers shared their opinion over the course of two weeks. The question asked, broadly, what is the best way to view the Star Wars Prequels? 20% (115 votes) said the best way to view the Prequels was in sequential order, ie BEFORE the Original Trilogy. More than double this number of readers disagreed and thought Star Wars should be watched in production order, starting with Star Wars (1977) “A New Hope”. The alternative option which boldly states the Prequels are best not watched at all got a whopping 34% (189 votes) proving that demographics of our readership at least, include at least 1/3 who genuinely dislike or loathe the Prequel addition to the Star Wars universe. A controversial subject within Star Wars fandom, but interesting nonetheless.
The new poll asks the question “How much do you care about BMS?” The fact we have readers is amazing. The fact a single webcomic strip like Wednesday’s could prompt over 80 comments in two days is mind-blowing. It says that a lot of people do stop by… enough to take the time to leave us a message. In the darkness of the internet this can be reassuring and inspirational. However, at the same time, the more people that comment, the more likely we hear from people who we have offended, or who are more interested in nitpicking the strip itself than commenting on the subject being parodied.
Although this is not the poll question, I’d be interested to know how many of you get a kick out of the more mature aspects of BMS humor and find it permissable. I do not intend to alter anything we’re doing. Basically, this train has one destination and it’s up to the readers at which stop to jump off. Just mind the gap when you do so… I honestly don’t know what that means in a metaphorical sense, I just thought it would sound smart. ;=
BMSketeer T. Gatto has a new wave of Blue Milk Special Paper Milk Cartons for us today. Imperial Death Squad Trooper, Rebel Fleet Trooper, TIE Pilot and Admiral Ackbar! Great work T. We look forward to seeing them in 3D! For more click here.
View the latest voting incentive strip here.
Wow, I wasn’t sure how you would top the last strip, but this had me rolling (my chair has wheels).
There’s a gag in every panel, OK, maybe not the third one, and Leia’s final line is awesome – completely diffusing the situation at hand. In response to your query – nothing you guys have produced has bothered me in the slightest. I like the mature angle you take and, being a Brit, I dig any images that remind me of the saucy seaside postcards of my youth 😉
Somebody make that Ackbar carton, pronto!
Don’t build the Akbar carton “it’s a trap”.
“It’s a trap!” is currently my two-year-old’s favorite expression. He last yelled it when we went through a Wendy’s drive-thru – LOL.
He’s right! lol They take your money first and you wait for your food no matter what because they got your money!
The cartons are great. I’ve collected them all but so far have only made the original one.
Would you mind if I posted the Biggs one on the BMS Biggs Fan club on facebook? It will be credited to you obviously.
I don’t mind.
I was hoping they made it to the BMS, or Biggs, or other Facebook pages somehow. As far as I’m concerned I make these for fun and for advertisement for BMS.
Any problems Rod?
No problems here. 🙂
Thanks
Somehow I’m two viewing this two hours BEFORE it was posted again. Anyway, about your question in the text, I think the mature aspects add another side to the humor. In a parody that is already lampshading the stupid plot holes, the alternate types of humor add a unique (in my humble opinion), flavor to the story.
I don’t know if my rate of commenting qualifies as “frequent”, but I figure I’m closer to “Vocal BMSer” than just “BMSer” …
😉
Wow, this story is full of more plot holes than your average fan fiction.
Seriously, somebody ok’d this? I’m horribly, horribly confused. How did SoTME ever hit the stands?
Author really is stupid, it might have only survived because of the day it was written, in a time where star wars fan fiction was very popular to read, they probably only ok’ed it because the author bribed them off.
But what could be SO tempting to let this pass through!?
Future parodies maybe?
The new poll is hilarious in its future results’ obvious inaccuracy. Well played.
But all the herp-derp is WHY we love Vader! He’s so scary and retarded (and thus even scarier).
Agreed!
Can’t belive 43% voted “not at all”. It’s like Figrin Daan says in your incentive strip: “those guys need to let go”.
Guys, it was 10 – 5 YEARS since the PT came out, give it a rest already…
Also, I’m starting to feel that vader’s comment fro mthe earlier panel about “the author never seen the original movie”, is more true than he understands… Good thing I don’t know this Foster guy, wouldn’t have any respect for him anyway :3
I haven’t read SOTME (yet) but like you said – you do wonder if Alan Dean Foster actually watched the film at all. I’m also surprised that George Lucas let such inconsistencies by (though I guess things were different back then).
As for the “mature humor” in BSM, I’ve always seen you guys as similar to me – someone who grew up with Star Wars loving it, who still loves it, but now looks at it with adult eyes but still loves it. I think your humor is spot on for our generation, and hope you keep it up as long as you keep BMS going. I’m also hoping that if you make it to the end of ROTJ you’ll include the breast groping scene in the comic.
Personally – I’ll be on this train to the end of the line 🙂
Maybe Lucas was paid to “Let such inconsistencies by”.
Another ‘Best Strip’ ever today. Thanks. I love the “Found it!” line.
So badly written that comic adaptation: “Shot up”. “Shot up?” For God’s sake – Vader would never speak like that.
And “Promise not to pass out” ? Awful. They reduce him to the level of a sadistic Nazi. Perhaps Vader’s character wasn’t as fully defined when this was written, so it’s easy to find it odd with 33 years’ hindsight – but it just doesn’t seem right.
Vader was never like the slimy-lipped Nazi in Raiders of the Lost Ark (the one with the coat-hanger). It worked there but not in SW.
The funny thing is, I can actually hear David Prowse saying these Vader lines from the book/comic better than I can hear James Earl Jones. I guess lines like “rather novel ways” etc just seem more British.
Yeah, but Prowse speaks in a west country accent, so nothing he says can sound scary. 🙂
I know. And yet I can still hear him saying it.
Yet I am used to a candid, rather ditzy vader. Ever heard of Chad Vader? That’s the vader I hear saying these lines, basically. The guy who voices chad is also very, very good at it; hell the guy was selected for Vader’s voice in TFU. However, there IS a certain difference to the voice of his and James Earl Jones’.
Prowse would be very fitting for this comic. This Vader deviates a bit from whom we were familiar with. (<= Is that even a correct sentence? Non native english writer at the rudder!)
I like the more mature aspects of BMS and the occasional hooter popping out is always a nice surprise and a nice treat, however I’d hate to see BMS slide into just another Tits and Ass comic on the internet.
I think “The More Honest and Inappropriate, and Honestly Inappropriate, the More Funny” so I’d request that you and the girl keep that in mind as you’re putting BMS together.
Also people are going to be offended by anything they CAN be offended by, that’s just what our culture has deteriorated into on the flip side of it deteriorating into just more shocking “Blue Comedy” because people can get away with it and want to be like South Park (whose “Offensive Humour” actually has a significance and serves as a Commentary on the pretenses that people have) and because they just aren’t creative enough to actually find ACTUAL humour in things, they’d rather rip it to shreds BULLYING it than poke fun at it.
I like Boobs. I like Farts. I like Pooping. I like Star Wars.
I DON’T like Bullying.
Eeeeeewwww! Leia! You have no idea what’s been on that cave floor before your ciggy-butt!
Come on, Luke! Make Vader spill his latte!!
Karen… it’s a temple… not a cave… But then, it was a ruined temple with a dragon guarding it… so….
Like I said – you have NO idea what’s been on that floor since that temple has fallen into disrepair. Apparently, while the Force may be strong with our intrepid heroes, sanitation is not. X P
http://www.dorkly.com/article/6976/gamebook-star-wars-the-empire-strikes-back-as-told-through-a-facebook-thread
Here’s something everyone might like!
Ackbar ‘liking’ Leia’s comment had me roaring – thanks for the linky.
Love it. 🙂 🙂 🙂
Only Vader’s arrogance (or is it incompetence) is keeping him from moping the floor with them.
Maybe his subordinates are spiking his coffee to keep him from his violent mood swings. 😉
I’m filling up the download section, does anyone else have anything to post (fan art, fan comics, semi-naked pictures of Bea Arthur)? 🙁
BTW Rod poor R5-D4 (obviously the most popular card model to date) needs posted to the downloads section sometime. Also where are all the cool pinups (like the Viagra ad)?
Yeah, that why I need helpers. Sometimes I wish someone else ran the website so Leanne and I had more time do the actual strip and blogs. :-/
When it comes to the humor, go for it! The majority of people here are fans that are now in our late twenties and thirties so hurting the virgin ears of children is (possible, but) not likely. And it’s good to see these renditions in an adult, yet maybe juvenile, fashion.
And when it comes to this website, my love has few boundaries. I can’t help in the way of making great milk cartons as Mr. T (yes, I know) has, but I check it every day it updates (who needs RSS??) and I declare that if there is anything I can do outside of promoting on my website, y’all just let me know.
And concerning this comic: yeeeeeah, ’tis obvious Mr. Foster had not read the book, and ’tis obvious if he’s not a pervert, he relied on sex appeal and overpowering of women to get the draw of an audience. Whether that would have worked or not, I know not. Clearly he didn’t use the strength of a woman because Leia gets beaten up and apparently she does hardly anything with that lightsaber.
I’ve never been called Mr. T. before. “I pity the fool who doesn’t read Blue Milk Special, and make my milk cartons!”
Hey I like it, now I just need a Mohawk, lots of jewelry, and some huge pectoral muscles. 😉
And the A-Team van. 😀
Splinter of the Mind’s Eye is written like a low-level Dungeons and Dragons module, like where the characters walk along, see a cave, and decide to explore it. Nothing really happens because the characters are very powerful yet, just some random monster encounters. Maybe a big finish. I liked the book when I read it as an 8-9 year old because that’s what I was playing at the time.
Anyway, I like (really like) how Leia is much more interested in finding her cigarette than anything to cover up with!
Yeah, I know what you mean. I think the book reads as if Alan Dean Foster was trying to make Star Wars his own series in hindsight. He had a freer hand, but also a deadline to meet. Things like the line about Vader thinking Luke shot his fighter must have been written in a late-night cram session, the book agents breathing down his neck.
I used to have a lot of respect for Alan Dean Foster, read his novelisations of The Black Hole and Alien, and even a few of his original novels. Nowadays, well, I think my tastes have matured. Though I still think his novelisation of Star Wars was great. Splinter, well, we all know it hasn’t aged well… 😉
Love that first panel, made me laugh. 🙂
As for mature content, as long as it works for the comic and you’re not doing it just for shock value (which I’m pretty sure you’re not), then go for it. It’s not up to you to make sure no one gets offended by every little thing. People are just looking to take offense at things these days, it’s really getting silly.
Trust me, Leia’s fashion disaster was done for comic shock. But I think we generally go pretty light on shock gag punchlines. Shock is the easy way out when a joke isn’t going anywhere. I don’t want to cheapen the strip by falling back to shock on a regular basis, and I think we are good about that. At least, that’s how I see it.
That’s basically what I meant. It didn’t feel out of place in this strip and you’re not doing it every other week because you’re 12 and have no better ideas, therefore no problem. It’s also extremely mild cartoon “nudity”…why would anyone complain? People are odd.
I think the cartoon style draws kids into reading this strip. But we definitely aren’t for kids.
Just try and tell my kids that, they learned all their Star Wars Cannon from BMS.
I just have to creatively edit the dialogue, and keep them from the racier strips.
All in all they like seeing the strip, and playing with the prototype cartons as much as their own books and toys.
BMS (with a little parental guidance) is OK for my kids.
Love the comic. Love everything about it. Love it, love it, love it!
And, yes, *laughs* love that one hand covers Leia’s “naughty bits” while the other has the more important job of finding her cigarette! Keep up the great work.
I wonder who would consider this an “adult” strip with that semi nudity so far…
To go with the A-Team motif: I pity the fools who were offended! Revise your moral standards, they seem to be heavily outdated! And – NO! – the Victorian Era is NOT the moral standard we should orient ourselves with today.
After all, it IS a comic for an adult audience and “why forbid a man a good steak because a baby can’t eat it?” (Mark Twain??)
Do what ever you want , I am fine with whatever station we get off at.
Love it all.
Love Leia almost completely naked and far more concerned about finding her cig than finding some clothes – and yet taking the time to effort to throw an arm across her breasts. That girl has priorities! “First a butt, THEN modesty.”
Perhaps Vader was talking about ‘Star Wars: Rouge Leader’ a game in which Luke managed to get behind Darth Vader’s Tie Fighter and shot it down and then Han Solo came in and pretended he did it.
BMSketeer forevah!
Hey, I was the coffee drinking Vader from over the summer, and my friend Brian is the madman behind the Jabba the Hutt Puppett you featured. We all love the strip, and the adult humor (and the art style) is what makes this strip stand out. Keep up the good work, and we can’t wait for ESB. P.S. Biggs still rules. I often yell Then my work here is done! despite not having helped out at all.
“If you promise not to pass out” seems to be a famous line with this guy.
Personally? I can’t help but take it in a dirty fashion. It just SOUNDS wrong as hell.
Some fun takes on the Empire Strikes Back http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6L8b1zPE0-Y
I think BMS is great and check here nearly every day for new strips and a browse through the comments. Nothing you have ever done has offended or even annoyed me. Keep doing what you are doing. You and Leanne have hit upon the right combination with BMS. The artwork is great and you maintain a excellent balance between telling the original stories and adding your own very funny uniqueness. I look forwards to each and evey new strip. Also, I’ve loved the Dr Who and role playing references in various strips, not to mention the nekked Leia (sorry did I say that out loud?)
Not sure If I’m a vocal BMSer or whether I’ve done enough to be able to class myself as a BMSketeer.
@ BlueSaber Vader I agree, Yeah! Biggs rules!
@Maxwell64 Love your avatar
Thanks dude!
You know what I just realized? It’s so completely impossible for Vader’s blow in the last strip to have completely destroyed Leia’s clothes that it’s utterly hilarious! I guess that’s what a week of 5 hours of sleep per night does to you… I also love Leia’s blushing in the first panel. Did she ever think to “distract” Vader? Neither of them knows they’re related, so what’s the harm ;). I love the cartons T.! But I think you should have waited a bit for Ackbar’s unveiling.
I too am amazed by how many people are completely anti-Prequels. Only TPM needs a ravamping interms of plot detail, and the only overall change needed is some better directing and better acting (not a change of actors). Then again there is the entire continuity issue with a full three years in the Star Wars universe, but I’m sure they have the money, resources, and fans to fix it (maybe add a year or two to help space thigns out, per Dr. Kermit).
Wanted to let you know that even though I rarely comment (it’s not you guys of course, it’s just not my thing), I constantly read the strips and vote everyday I can. Lastly, when did the store vanish? I don’t recall any mention of this happening in any of your posts.
Gee, this sure would be a good time for Biggs to show up, and NOT loan his spare cape to Leia.
daddy issues!
Leather? Check.
Skin-tight clothing? Check.
All-black? Check.
Strappy accessories? Check.
‘Punishment’ talk? Check.
The Dark Horse version (heck, even the novel version) of SOTME is starting to look like some BDSM kink! I’m just laughing and crying and cringing all at the same time!
Just recently stumbled upon BMS (never knew there was so much missing from my life!) and have been “silently” reading from the start for days (I just got to this strip today). I’ve resisted the urge to comment until now, I felt I just had to. 😀
I wonder how BMS Luke and Vader will react when they find out that they’re related to Leia, considering all the things they’ve done to her! (It’s probably already tackled with a published strip, but I don’t want to spoil myself) 😀
I’m excited to catch-up to this!